Random Thoughts on a Sunny Sunday

 • How is it that we are supposed to help a country, Iraq, if so many people there find that killing each other is better than learning to live with each other? Yes, it’s only a few who are terrorists. Yes, the terrorists might not even be from there. Yes, maybe the terrorists became terrorists after the US-invasion and occupation. But still, it’s hard to keep caring about people who keep blowing themselves up. Blowing each other up at weddings, while shopping, while looking for a job, while working, and worst of all, while mourning a loss at a funeral. Isn’t there a purpose to life other than another person’s death?

• Why do wealthy people register for gifts when they get married? Really? People need to buy gifts for Ivanka Trump and her new husband, who are both from real estate empire families. Can’t a person ever say enough? Why not a gift registry of organizations to donate to if they feel that they always deserve something? They should be ashamed of themselves.

• I wonder what happens in a teen’s mind that enables him to transition from writing essays that are merely lists in paragraph form to writing essays that analyze? Now I know why I’m happy to be teaching 12th graders and not just 9th graders: there are the occasional thoughts swirling around.

• Helicopter parents are not the only helicopters around, this morning I observed a helicopter wife. Really? He can’t put his own food into the microwave and spread the butter on his own bagel? He can hold the door for you but he can’t carry his cup of coffee? Are thoughts like these a reason why I am unattached?

• There is a man out there with whom I will find comfort, but I don’t know if we will find each other.

• Being a three-quarter empty-nester is better than being a complete empty-nester, but my, how I miss being on-duty all of the time. I’m pleased that both of my daughters are independent, and that I am independent of them, but it’s still hard to have a few dishes that reflects my eating and snacking habits.

• It’s beautiful outside. It’s time to put a bra on and go pick up my daughter from her weekend. She will probably say “okay” and turn away when I ask her how her weekend was. But we will be together on this beautifully sunny afternoon for at least a little while and I will be relieved from the pressure of thinking about myself and the world we live in. Enjoy the day.

Comments

[Ricardo]

They live to die. They are taught life here is nothing so killing themselves is the way to go cause the good stuff awaits them above. Silly and deadly.

It is nice out today.

[Elizabeth A.]

I don't even know what to say about Iraq, except please get our young men and women out. I honestly don't think our nations can understand each other.

I hate registries/showers/house warmings/huge birthday parties, etc. If you can't afford these items, you shouldn't be getting married, buying that house or having that kid. Or maybe I just really hate going to showers. So what's the limit? Top tax bracket and above?

I think empty nest syndrome could easily be compared to a helicopterer. That wife obviously enjoys or feels validated by being "on duty" all the time. Traditional gender roles work really well for me, keeps things simple. Nary an argument over the laundry. Every marriage is different.

It's really pretty here, too. And I am enjoying my day, thanks. I hope you and daughter do as well.

[Geo]

1. We certainly have taught the Iraqi people well. Thanks, Mr Bush.
2. My experience with wealthy people tells me that, no, there is no such thing as 'enough.' Look at AIG. Look at Wall Street. Who gives a damn about a country in crisis as long as there's profit.
3. When you find the answer, please blog about it. I would love to know.
4. Helicopter Wife or Husband With a Bloated Sense of Entitlement? No, you are perfectly correct to have these thoughts. Anyone who tells you otherwise wouldn't be right for you.
5. It will happen. People tell me that all the time. Not that I want to find a man, though. I greatly prefer women...
6. I'm sure that's a tough routine to break.
7. If it's time for me to put on a bra, I have more serious problems than I thought.

6.

[April]

I've always detested martyrdom, even in the less lethal forms.
Wedding gifts for almost everyone should be outlawed!

[JC]

When I saw the news and saw all of the rubble, all I could think of was "Why?" Just can't understand it.

I don't like wedding registries and would rather give someone a gift from the heart. For the record, I did NOT register for my wedding. My husband and I had lived together for three years and didn't need anything. I wanted the guests, not the gifts.

It was a beautiful day here too (although hot). I should have spent more time outside, but the nap was really nice.

[Dingo]

I understand the gist of wedding registries -- couple starting a new life and organizing a new house and all that. But when people are waiting longer and longer to get married and probably already have the things they would put on the registry, it makes sense that they would give things away that they now how in duplicate rather than register for more. As for the Trumps? Greed, pure greed.

[Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman]

Ricardo, in that case, it really is a culture clash and there is no common ground to be found. But the question is: are so many people so absolute in their beliefs? I would say yes. Which makes you wonder what a war on terror or extremism can do other than have those who are absolute even more entrenched. Why aren't those guys the ones smoking all the poppies?

Elizabeth A., Iraq, I think that whenever the US is in a country we are seen as the invaders and we end up playing sides against each other. We need to get out and to really provide the assistance people need: social services. Electricity not firepower.

I liked some of those roles, too, especially the laundry. But that's different from babying an adult; do you really want to be married to someone who is incapable of putting the right amount of sugar in his coffee and stirring it?

Geo, my daughter told me the other day that it's wrong that I have a bra from Victoria's Secret. Apparently I must be corseted. Perhaps that will prevent me from getting married and having to do a registry, which, by the way, I never did. In Israel they didn't do those things. And showers, I never had, again, in Israel they didn't do those things. No one wants to test "ain ha-ra" (the evil eye) and names are not divulged and purchases not finalized until the moment of arrival. As a completely non-superstitious person, I still liked that. Any way, my mother brought everything I could possibly need.

April, it was so unseemly--but nice--counting the cash after my wedding. We certainly are a gift-giving society. Is that how we express generosity, in gifts to those we know, and so allay our sense of not needing to worry about the larger society?

JC, I didn't have a wedding registry, but I definitely needed the gifts, except for the two crockpots that I never used and silver-plated ice bowl.

More rubble and destruction this week. I can never say enough times that I don't understand how people can think they have more of a right to live than anyone else, or their ideals are more valid than a person's life.

Dingo, Trumps, greed and entitlement. Maybe it's for their third home, which they really do need to furnish. I don't see how people have the energy to look through all of that stuff and think "I want this" and "I want this" and "I want this." Don't the wants ever end?