Do We Ever Do Nothing?
Just What I Needed

Problems Brewing

The man who must see me smile everyday came over to where I was sitting at the big table in the teacher’s lounge working on my laptop and gave me a from behind hug and then put his cheek next to mine. (I was actually working so I didn't notice his approach.) Uh oh. That surely went past the boundaries of our little dance: hello, chat, smile, goodbye. Have I mentioned that he’s a retired police officer? I think I’ll confront him by going to the library during my planning period for the next few weeks.

(Clarification: heading to the library is hiding, not confronting, of which I have a sad history of avoiding. I think that I will try just telling him that I was uncomfortable.) 


jessica bern

Yeah, I would say that was crossing a boundary or ten. How weird. Do you think the guy has a crush on you and he thought "now is a good time to make my move, look how happy she is"

Midlife Slices

Maybe he just thought you looked like you needed a hug. If you feel it was a bad thing then tell him. I don't understand how you can confront him if you go to the library during your planning period. Is that where he usually is or do you mean you'll hide from him? I'm confused.

Liz A.

I may have elbowed the guy.


Hi Laura,

Sounds like you've been having an interesting time of late. Just what you needed after a lovely restful weekend. Confrontation isn't an area I do well in either, but you felt uncomfortable. Remember what we teach our kids? If his closeness made you feel uncomfortable, it was too close for comfort. Perhaps asking him why he approached you like that the way to go.


Ick. And ugh.

Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman

Jessica, there was an innuendo in June which I ignored. There was nothing since then, so I figured he got the message. I guess he needs to be told point-blank.

MS, sorry the verbal irony was not so successful: the library is a place to hide. But I decided not to hide, I will tell him that he made me uncomfortable next time I see him, and the chance presents itself (euphemism for my nerve).

Brigit, fun time for sure. No, I think I'll skip asking him how he feels and go right to the "I" statement: I was made uncomfortable by your action the other day.

April, exactly what I thought. There's a big difference between talking with a colleague for a few minutes and touching a colleague.

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