A Minute to Myself (132)
January 11, 2009
Outlook
Do you feel responsible for something outside of yourself? How do you act on that?
Outlook
Do you feel responsible for something outside of yourself? How do you act on that?
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I have felt responsible for someone else's feelings for a long time. I took it in and lost part of myself by doing that. I have finally stopped. It's not a switch though, it's a process and it's hard. It is helping me learn about myself though, that's not easy either.
Posted by: Amy | January 11, 2009 at 03:59 PM
Since I have read about Ho'Oponopono I am starting to realize we are more responsible for things than we think.
Ho'Oponopono states that we keep war in place for example by our own thoughts that it cannot be solved or our own aggressive thoguths about anything actually.
I thought that my husband's childish behavior was the cause of my daughters' upsets and difficult relationship with me. Since I hold a clear space for a better relationship following the Ho' o .... technique there has been a remarkable improvement.
Cleanse all nasty thoughts, mine about them and their father and replace them with what is possible and forgiveness (if you can!) and love (if you can!).
I am kind if ignoring their behavior and holding the space for a better relationship and the girls are responding.
I also let my ex husband have less influence over my thoughts, give him less influence is all I can do.
At first I found it hard to swallow that I was responsible for everything in my life, however how else can things like war or childish ex husbands stay in existence? How else can the whole world condone this behavior. Should we not all whip the straying ones into shape, once we are back into our power?
Posted by: Wilma | January 11, 2009 at 04:07 PM
Amy, ugh, the horrible, awful, fruitful learning process that we call life.
Wilma, I went to a site to find out more about this because what you said sounds so interesting and seems to make sense even though it obviously points to doing things that are difficult. I guess it's like memory, there are just so many things that a person can remember, so why hold on to the things that bring the negativity into you when you can release them and keep or encourage the positive things. So you recognize the feeling, then let it go. There's no guilt there about creating the feeling, just seeing it and saying goodbye. I could definitely try that. As it is I try to not let him invade me too much, but at times it is hard. Which needs to be acknowledged. Thanks for bringing this to my attention--to keep there.
Posted by: Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman | January 12, 2009 at 02:36 PM
I spent a long time feeling responsible for an old friend's happiness, when in reality she wasn't being much of a friend, and her happiness depended on my unhappiness. It was only once I realised it, that I had the courage to break the bond I had with her.
It's tough going, and I feel the loss of the friendship I thought I had.
Posted by: Vicki | January 12, 2009 at 03:10 PM
Vicki, better to lose a friend than one's happiness.
Posted by: Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman | January 14, 2009 at 03:45 PM