Mideast Peace, Northern Virginia Style
Two Days’ Worth of Enough Beads

It Could Have Been Worse (One & Two)

1.  There was lightning and thunder this morning. It was a kind of rolling thunder that sounded like a god waking up from a heavy sleep rather than a force of nature attacking. After hitting the snooze button on my cell phone five times, I finally stopped resisting the inevitable and woke up. After three lovely, wonderful, peaceful nights at the apartment, it was hard to adjust (even if only temporarily) to the former marital residence. I dragged myself down the steps to the basement, turned on the water and got into the shower.

Just a few moments after full body coverage by water, the lights went out. Needless to say, a bathroom in a basement is windowless. So there I stood, in the comforting flow of warm hot water not ready yet to concede that it was uncomfortable in the pitch black of the bathroom. That is until I realized that if the electricity is out, then how am I going to get to work since the garage door is electric? And then I remembered that I had parked the car in front of the garage because I have boxes and furniture that need to be donated blocking my part of the garage. Which meant that my car was not in the garage, which meant that I was able to thoroughly enjoy my brief warm hot shower because, well, it could have been worse.

2.  Yesterday I had the briefest of conversations with slime. Since I have not noticed that he has packed a single thing, I told him that the organization to which I am donating things is coming on Tuesday, and, oh by the way, are you going to be packing. He said, yes he would be packing and moving onTuesday (which I knew) and good that the organization is coming then. Okay, I thought after that exchange, I could manage what my lawyer asked of me, and that is to see if he plans on paying the mortgage company what he owes it. I should have known, but I was lulled once again into thinking that he is on the normal scale as opposed to the psycho scale.

And he was off. First trying to tell me that he owes half of what he owes. Then he was trying to explain to me how the mortgage company applies payments (which I am well aware of without your lecture stupid little man). But when I repeated that he owes more and that I don’t want to be screwed out of the amount that is due to me because he is behind, I got the tantrum. After the whole “I’ll sue you” and “my lawyer is a bulldog” BS that came out of his mouth, he was off on a tangent. It’s always interesting (well, it could be interesting in a psychological way if I were a therapist or a researcher, but I’m not) to see where he takes off.

This time he took off to the world in which he is a wonderful guy. Yes, he apparently let me take things from the house. But once he said that, he was convinced of how great he is and then he got mad at how truly terrible I am. Yes—you stole a painting. I admit it, I almost took a photograph that is his (the division of assorted stuff is: if he picked it out, it’s his, which means he gets a lot of stuff), but he saw it in my hands and commented that it’s his and I put it back immediately. But that does not matter, what matters is that he saved the painting from me. And then he was onto how I stole wine glasses, apparently there had been eight. Some broke I said to his hearingless ears. The world in which glasses break because the glass is too thin is not the world he inhabits, no, he inhabits the world where ex-wives steal hree wine glasses (and ex-husbands notice that).

Oh my. But, it really could have been worse if the UNDER CONTRACT sign were not in front of the house and I had not basically moved into a lovely apartment which will be my full-time place in NINE days. 

Here’s to the optimist’s credo (“It could have been worse”): May it provide you with comfort and hope. 



That light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter and closer...


I'm so relieved for you! (Sorry I haven't been around here lately.)


As well as reciting that credo, keep reminding yourself that you have a new life and refuge ahead of you. The clock is ticking...

Liz A.

Good for you! It made me feel good to read this and see his tantrums no longer bring you down. You see through them and his manipulative ways, and that makes me smile.

Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman

MTAE, I would see the light if the electricity stays on. Maybe the lightening is a sign that the light doesn't depend on anything but my own nature.

April, you're welcome whenever you come, no requirements. Relief, yes, I feel it starting to flood in.

Beth, I stopped at the apartment yesterday and today on my way "home." It was wonderful: light and sunshine and air and birds and no suffocating presence, inside or out.

Liz A., I don't think that I didn't see through them before it's that the rattled and roiled into me, now I am almost ducklike, with impervious feathers.


I'm glad your car wasn't stuck inside the garage with no electricity to open it. Counting the days!


Men are the same everywhere. When thay are in the wrong and they know they are, they "attack", shout, become abusive. I had my fair share of that in the past. Fortunately my husband is not like that and hopefully will never be. Hope you will get rid of him forever very soon! All the best. Ciao. A.

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