Feminism, Still Alive and Pertinent to Me. WooHoo!
November 14, 2009
I think I will be perceived as just another bitter woman, but so be it. If I can’t change perceptions, I might as well go with them.
I’m sick of the male/female ratio of songs played on the radio with so many more boys than girls you would think that men are the vast majority of the population. I’m sick of the male/female ratio of DJs on the radio. Except for a couple of afternoon shows and the ubiquitous side-kick, it’s rare to hear a woman’s voice. I’m sick of the male/female ratio on the news. Is that why I have stopped watching the news? Or is it the news itself? Or is there some connection between the two? I’m sick of the male/female ratio in government. I know, I know, nothing new about old white guys, but for goodness’ sakes, can’t they just stop thinking that they should decide everything for the rest of us and people agreeing by voting for them. I’m tired of everyone I know having a “big boss” who is a man.
I know none of this is groundbreaking or insightful, but so be it. Sometimes the tried and true just really can get you down.
And I’m tired that people think it’s tiring that this needs to be continually revisited. And, as noted at She Writes about Publishers Weekly’s compendium of the ten best books of 2009: I'm tired that so often those who are acknowledged in certain fields, writing, are men. All of the top ten books are by men talking about sort-of men-things. Really? No women wrote great books in 2009? Oops. Maybe they wrote them but didn’t get them published? Just another bitter thought with no basis in any research—just life. And I’m annoyed that my younger daughter thinks I’m a crazy woman for thinking these things. Wait. Maybe I shouldn’t be annoyed at that. Perhaps it’s a sign that the next generation has truly changed and things will change. Or. Or that generation just doesn’t care and will take society as it is. And I’m pissed that the healthcare bill lets men continue to receive Viagra so they can control themselves, but us women are being denied the same thing—to have control over our own bodies.
I guess the time for being tired, annoyed and pissed is far from being over, unfortunately.
Valid arguments all. And nicely bullet-pointed :)
I have to confess, though, last time I walked into a Borders or Barnes & Noble a lot of the (fiction) books I saw were written by women. Not all, mind you, but they certainly had a good presence. I rarely go by Top 10 (or 40 or 100) lists to dictate to me what is popular or good, just like I don't bother with news (other than NPR) to reliably inform me of the world, so maybe I'm just out of the loop. Very good points, though.
Posted by: Geo | November 14, 2009 at 06:18 PM
I so agree with the Viagra thing. Insurance won't even pay for birth control pills. I think if men got pregnant, control over one's body wouldn't be an issue.
Posted by: A Teacher's Viewpoint | November 14, 2009 at 06:51 PM
I had similar thoughts, Laura, the other day when I was working at the Writers Guild of America. Although the Guild has quite a few women attorneys representing it, in every case I've been involved in, the writer who's brought a suit against a production company has been a man. It made me think that Hollywood is still a boys' club, which probably explains the popularity of certain movie genres and the perpetuation of some of the stereotypical ideas. I KNOW there are talented women writers out there, but why aren't they better represented in Hollywood?
The Viagra deal -- don't even want to go there.
Posted by: JC | November 15, 2009 at 04:52 PM
Very good points Laura. I don't think you are the only one that gets pissed off about these things! And no your not crazy!
Posted by: Lori | November 15, 2009 at 06:06 PM
Most of those issues don't bother me, but I feel ya.
I get so pissed about female fertility concerns. Really pissed. My doctor wouldn't even give me an IUD, but my husband can have a vasectomy any time he wants. NOT cool.
Just thinking of that conversation with that gyno really pisses me off. I believe the phrase, "Just wait and see, your ovaries will change your mind." was used. Are you kidding me?!?
Posted by: Elizabeth A. | November 16, 2009 at 10:20 AM
Geo, I don't abide by the lists either, but the fact that it was so unreflective of readers and writers is what bothered me. I wish each of those points could be shot down with facts, unfortunately, they still stand.
ATV, could you imagine men needing to take a pill everyday--and taking it? Just to push the envelope, could you imagine if men had to have a mammogram, you know that there would be funds invested immediately in a less painful--and humiliating--test.
JC, maybe that will be when I go to the movies. I thought that new media was supposed to be changing that disparity. Again, I don't think the reality is bearing that up. WHY? I guess that's like wondering how it is that the lobbyists and businesses own this country. A bit on a tangent, my finding from my master's degree program in conflict studies is that all the wars and conflicts revolve around power struggles. So if women don't tussle with the boys, they aren't going to change their ways. Surely a Catch-22 situation.
Lori, thanks for standing up for female solidarity.
Elizabeth A., what's that supposed to mean: your ovaries will change your mind. If you get pregnant it's because they wanted you to and if not, not? Sounds like arrogance to me. Did you change doctors?
Posted by: Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman | November 16, 2009 at 05:51 PM
Brava, Laura!!
I can't even get started on the amendment to the health care bill, it drives me so insane.
As for music - maybe this explains why I'm so much happier listening to my iTunes mixes in my car and at work! And I also think it may be why I love B'way musicals so much. There have been some great works lately that have starred women, with supporting male characters.
Still, what sickens me the most is the most famous female politician (even though she QUIT her position) right now everywhere I turn. She sickens me because she wants to put us back at home in the kitchen serving men while she calls the shots. No, thank you, and get the hell off the stage already!
Posted by: April | November 16, 2009 at 08:28 PM
I was thinking along these lines the other day after a long week at work (in UKs wonderful NHS where contraception is free and 80% of the workforce are women). It occurred to me that we've been fighting the wrong battle as far as feminism is concerned. Instead of battling for equal rights in the workplace, shouldn't we have been fighting for equal power in the home?. Women who have children or women (& men) who look after children should be accorded the same level of respect and power in society as judges and doctors - with the same financial rewards. In ancient cultures, womens fertility was worshipped. How did we let that power slip though our fingers?
Posted by: InvisibleWoman | November 18, 2009 at 11:51 AM
I didn't have to bother. I moved.
Apparently my ovaries are going to tell me I have to bear children and at the age of 25 they aren't mature enough to start talking to me yet and he has the authority to tell me what to do with my uterus.
Posted by: Elizabeth A. | November 19, 2009 at 11:00 AM
April, just like I don't know why Crocs and Uggs took off, I don't understand why Palin connected so intensely with so many. Who knows, maybe she will help to break barriers? Or maybe, as with singers, female politicians (or whatever it is that she is) will need to be attractive to get elected?
InvisibleWoman, as a teacher and a mother I can definitely say Amen to that. My new statement that covers all: power--the drive and desire and need for it has never usurped all in most women, hence the men's ability to wrangle their way onto of our lovely, sturdy shoulders. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem that those in control were able to relinquish any of their control to those who work well in teams and take people's feelings and lives into account.
Elizabeth A., some doctors are incredibly insensitive, and, in spite of their doing good in school, stupid. When I told mine that I don't want amniocentesis with daughter 2, he told me that it's no big deal and I shouldn't worry about it, since "You already have one."
Posted by: Laura of Rebellious Thoughts of a Woman | November 21, 2009 at 08:35 AM